New England Temperature Conversion Chart


60 degrees: Southern Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in New England sunbathe.

50 degrees: New Yorkers try to turn on the heat.
People in New England plant gardens.

40 degrees: Italian &English cars won't start.
People in New England drive with the windows down

32 degrees: Distilled water freezes.
Maine's Moosehead Lake's water gets thicker.

20 degrees: Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in New England throw on a flannel shirt.

15 degrees: New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in New England have the last cookout before it gets cold.

0 degrees: All the people in Miami die...
New Englanders close the windows.

10 degrees below zero: Californians fly away to Mexico.
The Girl Scouts in New England are selling cookies door to door.

25 degrees below zero: Hollywood disintegrates.
People in New England get out their winter coats.

40 degrees below zero: Washington DC runs out of hot air.
People in New England let the dogs sleep indoors.

100 degrees below zero: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
New Englanders get frustrated because they can't start their "kahs".

460 degrees below zero: All atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin
scale). People in New England start saying..."Cold 'nuff for ya?"

500 degrees below zero: Hell freezes over. The Red Sox win the World Series.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEEEEE ...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

and a
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SKYE!

Top Ten Signs Santa Hates You


10. Your stocking is ticking

9. Every kid gets a candy cane, you get a ball of rusty barbed wire

8. He brings you a new car -- right through the living room wall

7. His expression doesn't seem to be "jolly" so much as "seething and vengeful"

6. FBI bursts into your house saying, "We got a tip from Santa Claus you're hiding Mullah Omar"

5. You're being stalked by an elf hitman

4. You spend ten minutes telling him what you want -- he says, "Oh, I'm sorry, were you talking to me?"

3. Only item he leaves: a note reading "Your wife was great"

2. "Gift" he just gave you -- 2 weeks on a Disney cruise with Trent Lott

and the #1 sign that Santa hates you is ...

1. His distinctive laugh: "Ho, ho, go screw yourself"

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOHN!

Top Ten Santa Pick-Up Lines

10. I'll make you shake like a bowl full of jelly

9. I put the 'scroo' in 'Scrooge'!

8. I've got something you can hang a wreath on

7. One hour with me honey and you'll see flyin' reindeer

6. Buy you a Zima?

5. That is a candy cane in my pocket, and I'm glad to see you

4. Uh-yeah, that's right. I'm Kenny Rogers

3. I got your stocking stuffer right here, Shirley!

2. Giddy-up over here and say 'Howdy' to your fat, bearded cowboy of love!

and the #1 Santa pick-up line is ...

1. I've got an elf in my pants!

Top Ten Least Rented Christmas Movies


10. "'Twas 243 Nights Before Christmas"

9. "Frosty, the Anatomically Correct Snowman"

8. "Deuce Bistletoe: Male Mistletoe"

7. "The Grinch Who Sold Christmas On Ebay"

6. "The Christmas That Almost Wasn't Due To Santa's Urinary Tract Infection"

5. "Yo Ho Ho! Dave Letterman's Rappin' Christmas"

4. Discovery Channel Presents: "Elf Autopsy"

3. "Let's See What Bing Crosby Looks Like Now!"

2. "Tiny Tim: Big Where It Counts"

and the number one Least Rented Christmas Movie is ...

1. "Yentl"

Helpful Holiday Diet Tips

1. If no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.
2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, they cancel each other out.
3. If you eat standing up, it doesn't count!
4. STRESSED is just DESSERTS spelled backwards.
5. If you eat the food off someone else's plate, it doesn't count.
6. Cookie pieces contain no calories because the process of breakage cause calorie leakage.
7. Food used for medicinal purposes have no calories. This includes: any chocolate used for energy, brandy, cheesecake, and Haagen-Daz Ice Cream.
8. When eating with someone else, calories don't count if you both eat the same amount.
9. Movie-related foods are much lower in calories simply because they are a part of the entertainment experience and not part of one's personal fuel. This includes: Milk Duds, popcorn with butter, Junior Mints, Snickers, and Gummi Bears.

GodDAMNIT I need a Midol!!

Chris called a couple of hours ago to let me know he made it to LA alright. Of course I had to put his lil buddy on the phone. Jonathan loves the phone. He pretend-talks on my cell phone everyday then he hands it over to me when he's done while saying 'here'. While talking to Chris all he kept saying was 'hi', what sounded like 'hello', and a bunch of mumbling sounds some mixed with laughter. Then of course when you get a phone call from your eldest son, you get complaining. There was a total of 4 flights; the first with most of the chaperones, the rest with the kids and the hula halau that will be performing with them. Anyway, the complaint was that he'll be up way into the early morning putting together the quads and doing some other stuff. That's what you gotta expect when you're section leader.

Anyway, I'm off to slumber. I have to get up early to do the last of the pies ... thank goodness.

Have a safe Holiday and drive safely!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Tonight was turkey night for us because Chris will be spending his Thanksgiving in Disneyland for his band trip. For whatever reason they will not have everyone together for dinner ... everybody is pretty much on their own for meals so I thought I'd cook turkey for him today.

Chris leaves for LA on Wednesday. Probably his last big trip during high school. He's been on three major trips. His Freshman year to NY for the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade, his Sophomore year to Vancouver for Concert Band, and his Junior year to LA. He thinks for his Senior year they're just going to do the neighbor island thing. His next big trip won't be until right after graduation. I'm sending him to Korea (his pick) with some friends of his for a month as a graduation present.

Sianna has not been off the rock yet. Jonathan will probably get off before she ever does with his dad to visit grandma in Florida. She's not too thrilled about that. I'm trying to convince her that when she gets to high school, she'll get to go on at least two trips with the band. She's looking forward to that. She already knows that she has at least one trip to look forward to and that would be her graduation present ... anywhere she wants to go.

Getting hectic here so I'm off ...

So ... Michael Jackson is accused, once AGAIN, of child molestation, eh?
My question is this ... what the FUCK are these parents thinking when they allow their children to stay over night at this person's home?? I don't give a flying rat's ass how rich or how famous this person is. I would NEVER let my children near this man let alone sleep over at his home. So far no civil case has been made ... we'll see ... they (the boy's parents) claim they want justice done instead of the money. Yeah, I say give it time.

HAPPY BELATED B-DAY ANGEL!

Gary ... if you're reading this ... call me!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GHOST!

Wry - I know what you are going through ... been there one too many times. As long you have the love and support of your wife and son, things will be fine.

Kudos to Moanalua High School Marching Band for an outstanding performance last night at the Meadow Gold Marching Band Festival. All season there was this hype about Mililani HS and what an awesome show they have this year ... needless to say I was not impressed. Since Chris has been in high school, his third year now, in my opinion Mililani's shows have gone downhill. I think their show two years ago was really good. Pearl City performed well last night. For once the flags were all together. The percussion section was awesome, as usual and I'm not being bias or anything. Sianna got to be part of the performance last night as well. The Intermediate band got to help with the props for the finale and she even got to stand just behind her brother as well just before she almost made him trip ... LMAO! Well, marching season is at it's close with Pearl City's last performance Thanksgiving weekend in LA in the Hollywood Christmas Parade.

Well, I'm off ... Jonathan comes home in a few and I need to finish the laundry.

Enjoy the rest of the week!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

For all those men who believe that there's no reason to
buy the cow when you can get the milk free, read on...


Nowadays 70% of women are against marriage, as they
have wisened up to the fact that for 200 grams (7 oz.)
of sausage it's not worth buying the entire pig!

How much more should you know about Monty Python?
brought to you by Quizilla

By the way ... it was nafjobs.com.

What Natural Disaster are you? Take the quiz!

ATTENTION:

Stay off the roads if you value your life ...

Chris got his license yesterday ... enough said.

Any of you reading this can you please do me a favor? I'm supposed to be applying for this DOD job and for some reason I can't access the website. If any of you can, could you please e-mail me the link?
It's www.nasjobs.com. Mahalo nui loa.

All kidding aside, Chris is a pretty good driver. For one thing ... I'm the one who taught him, heh.

Anyway, have a great week!

An airplane was about to crash....

An airplane was about to crash; there were 5 passengers on board, but only 4 parachutes.
The 1st passenger said, "I am Kobe Bryant, the best NBA basketball player; the Lakers need me, I can't afford to die." So he took the 1st pack and left the plane.
The 2nd passenger, Hillary Clinton said, "I am the wife of the former U.S. President, a NY State Senator and a potential future president. And I am the smartest woman in American history, so America's people don't want me to die", and she took the 2nd pack and jumped out of the plane.
The 3rd passenger, George W. Bush, said, "I'm the president of the United States of America. I have great responsibility being the leader of a superpower nation." So he grabbed the pack next to him and jumped.
The 4th passenger, the Pope, said to the 5th passenger, a 10 year old schoolgirl, "I am old and frail and don't have many years left, and as a Catholic, I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute."
The girl said, "That's okay. There's a parachute left for you. America's
smartest woman took my schoolbag."

And the countdown begins ...

We, employees at ILCC got the word over the weekend that the restaurant has been sold. Tentative last day is October 12. For one, I hated that place. What kept me there for almost 4 years was the my regulars and most of my fellow co-workers ... and the cash every night was good too. Anyway, the man who told us about the sale is hated by everyone. Of the two years he was there with us, this was the only decent thing he did. You see, the owners wanted to give us a one day notice but our GM did the right thing. He's also going to help those who want, a replacement for employment elsewhere. Another option, which is more for the back of the house employees, is the chance to transfer to their other two locations on the other side of the island. They also won a bid to open a store in the New Navy Exchange that is set to open in November. Who is taking over you ask? We found out that Ruby Tuesday bought the place within the month it was posted. Are they going to keep the employees? We won't know until next week ... hopefully. They would be crazy not too. They have a deadline. They are supposed to open 2 RT's by a certain date and so far they only have one location in the works. The original gossip was that they needed to open our store by Thanksgiving. Now we hear they won't be able to open until the beginning of the new year with all the renovations they want to do. You'll know what's going on when I hear it from the horse's mouth.

I've started getting some pre-holiday orders for my catering as well as my massage business ... hopefully that will keep me busy until RT opens, and that's assuming that they keep us on ... got my fingers crossed!

'Goodbye, Ruby Tuesday
Who could hang a name on you
When you change with every new day
Still I'm gonna miss you ...'

I KNEW IT!

It was just a matter of time before Ben and Jen would break up and I knew it would be Ben who would end it. He aint ready for marriage and I don't think he will ever be ... he's too much of a player. I just want to see Chris Judd's reaction to all of this.

Pearl City lost, no real news there. Final score was like 35-20 or something in that area. The King was hilarious ... all decked-out with his pimp walking cane and pimp hat.

Jonathan's party was a success. Little man is a rich little man. We didn't get hit by Hurricane Jimena but it was pretty windy that day.

Aloha Week festivities are on the way which started with the Downtown Ho'olaule'a this past Friday. The parade was Saturday and there will be all kinds of activities all week Downtown and Waikiki which ends with the Waikiki Ho'olaule'a on Friday.

GO CHARGERS!!

It's that time of year again ... Pearl City High School is having their Homecoming game tonight against Mililani High School. It's been tradition, going as far back as to when I went there, that PCHS always loses Homecoming. Except for last year. For some reason we won, and we won big! Anyway, Mililani is like one of the best teams in the newer district ... I think they were like 2nd in the district last year ... so, I expect an ass-kicking tonight. The band, of course, is performing the full show ... which is awesome ... it starts off with a percussion solo for like 16 or so measures then goes into Ben Hur.

Anyway, the parade is about to get away and I gotta get a catering order ready for tonight. I have orders for 20 bentos that will be picked up at 4:30.

Have a great weekend!

HAPPY 1st BIRTHDAY JONATHAN!
MOMMY WUVS YOU!

LMFAO!! Dammit Wry ... I am in tears ... you made me dribble on my shirt too you sucka.

Taking a break here from baking and shit.

Once again, I hurt my leg last night when I went running after work. No real biggy ... I tore a muscle in my left calf ... again ... and I scraped-up my knee in the process. I've been really clumsy lately ... go figure. Because of this, I'm out of work for a week and I'm on pain killers and crutches.

Damn ... if you could only smell my kitchen right now. I just pulled out my shortbread crust for my cream cheese cake from the oven and the aroma is heavenly! A hint of cinnamon and a hint of a few other hush-husg stuff is making me drool. I've been in a creative mood lately and I've been experiencing with some of my recipes and this crust was one of them. This means that all of the guests at the party tomorrow will be my guinea pigs ... hehe.

Oh yeah, and by the way ... mother nature is throwing a curve ball here ... we've got Hurricane Jimena coming our way as we speak. It'll be interesting to see what happens tomorrow at Jonathan's party. It's supposed to hit us Monday. It's already been pretty windy most of these past few days and they say it's supposed to get up a few notches by tonight. So, you know what this means ... Jas, you need to get that pool started.

Anyway, my break is over. Fill you guys in later as to what happened with the hurricane and stuff.

Have a great weekend!

Busy, busy, busy ...

So how's everyone? As for me, I'm just taking a break from making goody bags and favors for the party on Sunday. I can't believe how fast a year has gone by. In the last year Jonathan has gained 15 pounds and has grown 13 inches. He turns one on the 4th. Everything is just about ready for his party. Unlike his siblings, his party is more intimate. About 35-50 people are expected. RSVPs are due Wednesday ... HINT, HINT to some of you.

Anyway, gotta get back work.

Have a great week!

HAPPY 36 BOOGIE!!

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Indubitably;
Innovative;
Preliminary;
Proliferation.

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Specificity;
British Constitution;
Passive-aggressive disorder;
Loquacious Transubstantiate.

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY
WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:

Thanks, but I don't want to have sex;
Nope, no more beer for me;
Sorry, but you're not really my type;
Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight;
Oh, I just couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

Where'd everybody go?

Happy belated 1st birthday to Nicholas!

Speaking of 1st birthdays, my lil munkey turns 1 on September 4th. I swear to God the year flew by real fast! We're in the process of planning the big event that happens on the 31st of this month. I got a bunch of people coming by next week to work on the favors.

Ok, someone slap me. Last week I had the maternal urges again. I would LOVE to have another child, a girl this time, but I am not going through another pregnancy. Besides, I'm all fixed so no chance of that happening.

Well, I gotta run. Hope all the MIA's are doing well. Have a great weekend!

It's nice to see that some people haven't changed over the years. For the rest, they're still the same miserable, bunch of asses. Yes, I'm talking about my 20th reunion. Do I sound bitter? No. Some of these people are still as phony now as they were in high school. You would think that they would grow out of it over time. They still think that we owe them or something. I wasn't impressed with them then, and I'm sure not impressed with them now. Few of the guys that I hardly got along with back then I'm great friends with now. I think having their own children played a big part of their transformation. I was also amazed at all the people who had their first child within the last year. A few of them mentioned to me that despite their degrees and prestegious lifestyles, they were not complete until they had a child. Our Class President is still the same. She is still the awesome woman she was back then. She's currently working on her PhD. Over all, I had a GREAT time. We're even gonna have a reunion next month so those who couldn't attend could go to that one. More to say on the reunion later. I have to get ready for work so I wish you all a great weekend!

I'm back ... I'm tired ... and already someone had to piss me off. Anyway, more on my trip later. Out of the 5 days, I probably had about 15 hours of sleep, so I'm gonna sleep now.

Laters!

Wish me luck ...

Tonight I fly out to Vegas for my 20th reunion. I wasn't really looking forward to this until just a few hours ago. So many people I really wanted to see again won't be there this time. Out of the ones that are going, only a handful I would like to catch up with ... the others I could care less for. I know, that sounded really negative. I just don't care for these people ... never did in high school either. All in all ... I'm way due for a vacation and I'm gonna make the most of the 5 days there. Oh yeah, wish me luck!

I'll be back next week to let you all know how I did!

Have a great week/weekend!

It's time to cut your 10 1/2 month old son's hair when you go grocery shopping and all the old ladies asks how old your daughter is.


The DVD I ordered from the UK, '28 Days Later', got here last week. Chris pointed out some of the mistakes that weren't taken out in editing. Watching it for the 2nd and 3rd time I found it to be humorous.

Hope everyone is well. I am scrambling to get last minute bills paid and other stuff before I leave for my reunion next week Wednesday. I can't wait to get to Vegas. The last time I was there was about 14 years ago. The last time I got off the rock was in '98. I am way over due for a vacation. Everyone at work laughs cause I am literally counting down the days and hours.

Well, gotta run ... post soon!

Hope everyone had a great weekend. As for me, it was kinda hellish. Chris had his MRI this past Thursday and we just found out yesterday that he has a herniated disc in his lower back and may need surgery. He's on Vicodin and my guess is that he's in Heaven.

Also this weekend, I went to see '28 Days Later'. It was a pretty good movie but there's always room for improvement. The lead, Cillian (pronounced Keel yan) Murphy, did a good job. I did some searching and came across two other movies he made that interests me so I'm going to go and rent them to watch.

Speaking of zombie movies ... I am STOKED! I just read that there's gonna be a remake of George Romero's 'Dawn of the Dead' as well as a loose sequel to 'Night of the Living Dead' called 'Escape from the Living Dead'. There are talks that high-profile actors such as Jeff Goldblum, Patrick Swayze, Dennis Hopper, and Jim Carrey that want to be in this film. The DOTD remake is already filming in Toronto and it is said that this time around the movie is very different. I can't wait to see them!

Bed is calling ... so you all have a great week!

Congrats to Chynakatt! She's adorable!

I went to check the virtual nursery and there she was. She's a doll ... great job!

It's now confirmed ... for whatever reason the band will NOW be doing the Hollywood Christmas Parade this year. In the past week I've sold $500 worth of stuff for Chris' fundraiser ... half of which goes into his account that goes towards paying for his trip. Tomorrow I'm picking up more stuff.

I got more to add, but J is getting ready for bed and he's cranky tonight. More later ...

A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon
their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would
transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the father. He asked if
they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it.

The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters, explaining that even
10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before. But
as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go
ahead and kick it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20%
pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the
husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this
point they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel quite
well.

Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out the wife considerably,
the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him. The wife
delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her husband were
ecstatic.

When they got home, the mailman was dead on the porch.

A fire fighter is polishing a fire engine outside the station when he notices a little girl next door in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the side and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle. The little girl is wearing a fire fighter's helmet and has the wagon tied to a dog and cat. The fire fighter walks over to take a closer look,

"That sure is a nice fire truck," the fire fighter says with admiration.

"Thanks," the girl says.

The fire fighter looks a little closer and notices the girl has tied one wagon leash to the dog's collar and one to the cat's testicles.

"Little Partner," the fire fighter says, "I don't want to tell you how to run your fire truck, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could probably go a lot faster."

The little girl pauses for a moment to think, looks at the wagon, at the dog and at the cat, then shyly looks up into the fireman's eyes and says......

"You're probably right, but then I wouldn't have a f*cking siren now would I ?"

This is the fairy tale that little girls should have been reading a long time ago !

Once upon a time,
in a land far away,
a beautiful, independent,
self-assured princess
happened upon a frog as she sat,
contemplating ecological issues
on the shores of an unpolluted pond
in a verdant meadow near her castle.
The frog hopped into the princess' lap
and said: Elegant Lady,
I was once a handsome prince,
until an evil witch cast a spell upon me.
One kiss from you, however,
and I will turn back
into the dapper, young prince that I am
and then, my sweet, we can marry
and setup housekeeping in your castle
with my mother,
where you can prepare my meals,
clean my clothes, bear my children,
and forever feel grateful and happy doing so.
That night, as the princess dined sumptuously
on a repast of lightly sautéed frog legs
seasoned in a white wine
and onion cream sauce,
she chuckled and thought to herself:

I don't phucking think so.

Going back to what I was talking about … cause I kinda lost my train of thought and got side-tracked …
I tend to be very anal when it comes to pronouncing Japanese words. Just ask Ghost. I went to visit in January of ‘98, the year the Winter Olympics was at Nagano, Japan. My beef was the way NAGANO was pronounced. It was driving me nuts to watch newscasters, who by the way should have been doing their job and researching the correct way to pronounce NAGANO, pronounce said city as NAGA NO. It is pronounced NA GA NO. The same way people were irritating me by the way they were saying karaoke. It is not pronounced carrie oh key. It is pronounced kah (as in car) rah oh ke (as in kay). Do we have it now?

With that off my chest, I bid you a good night.

Yeah, I’m still here … just been busy.

Ok, for the past year I’ve been brushing up on my Japanese for the Japan trip that was supposed to happen this October with Chris and the marching band. Because of the whole SARS thing going on they’ve decided to do something else. So, the Band Director informed us at the latest band booster meeting that they are putting in their application, along with an impressive resume, to perform at a halftime show for either the Denver Broncos or the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in October. They’re looking to perform a Monday night game that falls on the kid’s two week break in that month.

I really feel for you, WryGuy. I have been fortunate to have all three of my children sleep through the night beginning at the age of two months. Jonathan is the only one who has problems sleeping when he is sick. He takes after his father who had bronchial asthma when he was a baby so when Jonathan gets sick, usually on the second and third night are the worst.

An early congrats to Chynakat and her family on the upcoming arrival of her new daughter. I went to checkout that virtual nursery website and I thought that was pretty neat. I’ll be looking for Cassidy when the day comes.

Hope all is well with you Angel. I have some film that needs developing and I’ll have some pics to share when I get them. Kisses to the girls for me!

Some good news for now. The biopsy I had a few weeks back were cancer free … thank God. That’s all I need was more stress. Geez … getting older really sucks sometimes.

Anywho … Jonathan is glaring at me and I need to entertain him so I’ll be back soon …

Laters …

I love you all!

A funny card for you

Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch, "Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?" The birch says he cannot tell.

Just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling. The birch says, "Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"

The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree. He replies," It is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch. It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever put my pecker in.

Apparently a radio station that I listen to in the mornings are having a ‘Fear Factor’ qualification thing going on this week. The winner will go on to the real thing on the mainland representing Hawaii. Anyway, today the semi-finalists were in and they had to answer trivia questions. If you answered wrong, you had to pull a paper from a bag that told you what part of your body you had to shave the hair off of. People were shaving Mohawks, eyebrows, half of eyebrows, pubic hair, underarms, legs … and the majority of the contestants today were men. I think only two were women which one of them dropped out as soon as she found out you had to shave a body part. Anyway, that wasn’t all. The contestants were finally whittled down to about 3 or 4 people. At that point they found out the real deal. They had 90 seconds to eat peanut butter mixed in with the hair they shaved off. If I heard correctly, it was about a cup of peanut butter and a handful of hair. I heard someone say the guys had big hands … LOL! It was the lone girl who was the one who shaved her pubes. I didn’t listen to yesterday’s competition but the day before that they had to eat what they called ‘shoyu cereal’. What it was they had to eat was a cup of Grape Nuts mixed with clams, clam juice and shoyu (soy sauce for you mainlanders). I’m dying to hear what they do tomorrow.

The leg is slowly getting better but if I step wrong I fell like putting my hand through a wall. It’s not easy chasing an 8-month old around … he’s a fast crawler and he gets around pretty well holding onto the furniture on his legs.

Well, I’m off … got some shopping to do. I seriously need a new wardrobe. Everything I do are for the kids. I can’t remember the last time I actually bought something really nice for myself. I’ll buy like a blouse here or there, I just haven’t bought anything really nice like for going out perhaps on dates and stuff like that in over several years. With the reunion coming up in a little over two months and after losing all the baby stuff I deserve to pamper myself. So, out goes all the maternity stuff, all the oversized stuff, and all the hoochie stuff I used to wear before I got pregnant. Don’t get me wrong, I still like some of the hoochie stuff, it’s just with the baby now I think I should dress a little more conservative … just a little.

Well, I’m off to the mall … enjoy the rest of the week!

HOW CAN YOU LIVE WITHOUT KNOWING THESE THINGS?


In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled Gentlemen Only
Ladies Forbidden....and thus the word GOLF entered into the English
language.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were
Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

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Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

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Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Coca-Cola was originally green.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It is impossible to lick your elbow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%
( now get this...) The percentage of North America that is
wilderness: 38%

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400

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The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000

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Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

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The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The youngest pope was 11 years old.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Those San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If a statue in the park of a person on a horse
has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle.

If the horse has one front leg in the air
the person died as a result of wounds received in battle.

If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural
causes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th,
John Hancock and Charles Thomson.
Most of the rest signed on August 2,
but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language. (No!)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them
looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. What occurs more often in December than any other month?

A. Conception.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?

A. Their birthplace

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. Most boat owners name their boats.
What is the most popular boat name requested?

A. Obsession

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go
until you would find the letter "A"?

A. One thousand

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and
laser printers all have in common?

A. All invented by women.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?

A. Honey

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. There are more collect calls on this day than any other day of the year?

A. Father's Day

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. What trivia fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is the most
ironic?

A. He was allergic to carrots.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. What is an activity performed by 40% of all people at a party?

A. Snoop in your medicine cabinet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened,
making the bed firmer to sleep on.
Hence the phrase "goodnight, sleep tight."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month
after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all
the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar
was
lunar based, this period was called the honey month we know today as the
honeymoon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts..
So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would
yell at them mind their own pints and quarts, and settle down.
It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the
rim,
or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the
whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by
this practice.

~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~

At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow.

For any of you who hasn’t had a torn muscle in your life … I don’t wish it on anyone … that shit hurts like a bitch! I don’t know what the heck happened last night … I usually stretch before any workout at least 15 minutes and last night I stretched for a little over half an hour while I was watching Will and Grace. Besides, you can add another warm up stretch at the beginning of my step video. Seven minutes into the actual routine I heard a loud POP. At first I thought it was my knee ‘cracking’. At the same time I heard the POP, I felt an intense, sharp pain going down my calf and it was not pretty. It’s 19 hours later and I still can’t put any weight on my right leg, even with the pain killers. This is highly upsetting for me because I have been on this plateau in my workout for several months now and was only now beginning to start shaping up again. Oh well, whatcha gonna do, eh?

So, I had yet another surgery two weeks ago for the endometriosis and thanks to the pilates I’ve been doing now since the beginning of the year, my recovery has been faster this time around. So, that’s where I’ve been. I go back on Friday for a checkup.

My PC died, almost. Actually I brought it back to the guy who built it to have it upgraded and he called me back to say the motherboard was dying and I was better off buying a new one, which I did Friday. I love it, so much speed. Kazaa, here I come!

Where the hell is everyone? Hope all is well with you guys. Angel, I’m here for ya if you need to talk. How are things going with court? Good luck to you guys.

I’m out … gonna go see X Men 2 … limping and all.

Have a great week!

It is too hysterical watching Sianna teach Jonathan to drink from a cup.

See you all in a few days, I'll fill you in when I get back.

Until then ...

Growing up with my brother we had the typical sibling rivalry; we competed in about almost everything. Without getting into a long detailed story, when I was in the 9th grade and Eric was in the 6th grade, we moved out of our high school’s district and was therefore supposed to get a district exception to continue attending the schools we were already attending. A good friend of the family let us use his address so we didn’t have to go that route. Anyway, by my Senior year, Eric became a Freshman and attended the high school I was at. By this time Eric was a stellar soccer player and any sport he played he excelled in it. As good as he was in sports, he also maintained his grades and was an honor roll student. Before I forget, The friend of the family I mentioned earlier also had a son who was a year older than me. The school caught up with our false address scheme and gave me the ultimatum of turning in an application or else I would have to leave the school and attend the school in the district I lived in. I guess because I was going to be a Senior, they allowed my application. Eric, however, did not fill an application. One day towards the end of the school year a dumbass pulled a knife on him and they got into it. Of course Eric kicked this guy’s ass and they both were caught and sent to the Principal’s office. Seeing that Eric did not have an exception, he was kicked out this school to attend the other school. No investigation and it didn’t matter that he attributed to the school’s athletic department. This became a turning point in his life we now look back and call HELL.

Everything he accomplished up until then went down the drain. He started hanging around punks and got heavily into the drug scene. He ended up dropping out of school. Over the course of the next 12 years (‘82-’94) he was in and out of jail for mostly shoplifting to support his habit, parking violations up the ying yang, and making my life miserable. There was a period before he rented a house with some of his addict friends that he lived with me. He stole from me almost trashed my car on a couple of occasions, and a few other things. He’s my only brother and I put up with a lot of his shit before he took it too far. Then out of no where he started going back to church and completely made a big turn around. That was going really well up until our mother passed away and the insurance money kicked in. Well, you know how THAT went. Within a year his money was gone. He was then given the ultimatum to either go to prison for 5 years or turn himself in to rehab. He took the later and spent two years total. The first month he couldn’t have any contact with the outside. Eventually he could go out but that was only to work … they got him a job while he was in there. Later he got weekend passes. I think that by the end of his first year he was able to leave completely with two or three sessions a week. I’m happy to say that he’s been clean now for 9 years.

Over the last few years he’s gone back to school, has a really great job, and is now in the process of building his dream home with his wife which should be done building in July. He has three children- two girls 8 and 5 and a son who will be 3 in August.

Habanero chips are overrated. Jalapeno chips are way better.

On that note, have a great weekend and have a fantastic Easter!

HAPPY 35th BIRTHDAY ERIC!

A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts."
She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer. When he finished it, he said,
"Quick, bring me another beer. It's gonna start."
This time she looked a little angry, but brought him a beer.
When it was gone, he said, "Quick, one more beer before it starts!
"That's it!" She blows her top! "Don't you waltz in here, flop your big butt down, don't even say
hello to me and then expect me to run around like your slave.
Don't you realize that I cook and clean and wash and iron all day long? Don't you realize ....."
The husband sighed ...
"DAMN It's started!"

Human pin cushion here … oh yeah, did I mention I’m back on Air Force payroll? Technically no … I work there as a civilian. More on that later. Anyway, I got my shots updated today and my arms hurt. Especially where they gave me my tetanus shot. It was fine going in, but I felt the burn a few seconds later. The last time I had a tetanus shot was January ’86 at basic training. Uh, huh … I know … every ten years … I’ve been lucky. I go in tomorrow to get some blood work done as well. It could have been done today but I had toast for breakfast and some of the tests needed a 12-hour fast.

Chris called from Canada … he’s having fun.

Baby just left awhile ago with dad for the weekend.

On that note, I’m going to go and shower (I had a really great workout earlier) and take a nap before I get ready for work.

Have a great weekend!

Welcome back WryGuy!

Chris leaves for Vancouver today in about 5 hours. He's not even done packing.

Sianna just left for her Math Team practice.

Jonathan is a few feet from me staring. He got pissed at Sianna earlier and tried to smack her. I thought that was so funny. He's just like mommy with that temper of his. He turns 7 months next week and we're already starting to plan his 1st birthday party. Traditionally it's supposed to be a big-ass baby luau here where I live. Been there, done that. At Christopher's party we had close to 400 in attendance. Sianna's party originally had a guest list of 500 but because my mother passed away two months earlier, we cancelled the party then later decided to go ahead with it. Her party ended up having about 175 people ... we weren't able to get in touch with the rest or they were unable to attend the new date. This time around, we're just gonna make it simple. we're looking to probably invite 50-75 people. So far we're looking to have it at the Marina where John has his boat docked. They have a big area for barbequing and then of course the three different coves where the beaches are. He's going to hook up the inner tube for anyone who wants to take the boat out and maybe some fishing. It's still several months away and I got some time to decide what we'll do.

Well ... it's that time to run. Gotta get Chris to the airport and do some errands. So, until next time have a nice day!

Gawd ... I need a new look, my blog that is. Any and all help/suggestions will be greatly appreciated!

Is this freaky or what?

Earlier today I went to work and as I was trying to unlock my car door with my remote, I had dropped my 1 ½ liter water bottle and it started to roll under my car. So, I opened the door to put my things in and I started to look under the car … nothing. I figured it must have rolled to the other side. I walked around to look and nothing was there either. I then proceeded to get on my knees to look and still nothing! At this point I started to get a little freaked-out by all of this. I then looked within 5 feet all around the car and there was still no water bottle. Where the heck did it go? I called Sianna to get me another bottle and she looked around only to run back into the house cause she got creepy about it. Only God knows.

Hope all of you had a pretty good weekend.

Angel – you and your family are in my prayers …

Have a great week!

I'm just laughing my ass off here ...


You are not European.


What's your Inner European?
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Yummmm ... Percocet is good!

Munky is doing better … his wheezing went away; negative on the RV virus, his eye exam went splendid; no defect whatsoever, and his ear infection has all cleared up. He turns 6 months on the 4th and he has his 6-month physical on the 5th. Chris has his Uta Matsuri performances this weekend so he’ll hardly be home. I have to remember to call the banks next week for International Exchange Rates so I can get his spending cash/Traveler’s Checks in order. Sianna had her 12-year physical and she’s growing normally. Hawaii law now states that in order to enter the 7th grade, you have to show in black and white a history of having the chicken pox or have had at least two varicella shots along with all other shots updated. Well, she had it mildly back in 1993 a week after Chris got it from school. Because Chris was brought in and documented, when I called the week later, I was told I didn’t have to bring her in because they assumed that it was chicken pox. So no documentation for her. Who would have known that she would be in the first class to enter the 7th grade that had to have a history documented somewhere. Anyway, she ended up taking a blood test to check for immunity, and sure enough she does. No shots for her. She did however had to take a flu shot, which she was not too happy about. As for myself, I go in for an ultrasound on the 11th because I’m having problems again. Last time I had my little talk with my doctor, he was talking possible hysterectomy. We’ll see. As much as I don’t want one, if it means no pain and no anemia (I’m tired ALL the time) then a hysterectomy it is. I’ll keep you all posted.

Have a great weekend!

I have a few words to say …

THE CLASS OF 2005 WAS ROBBED AGAIN!

Tonight Sianna and I went to PCHS’s 26th Annual Songfest. I was happily surprised by tonight’s performances by all of the classes with the exception of the Freshman class. I’m sorry, but you guys sucked. The Sophomores went first. Their theme was ‘Happy Times’ and their attire resembled that of the Broadway show Rent. The first song they sang was ‘Dancing in the Street’ followed by ‘Seasons of Love’ and ended with ‘Lean on Me’. I don’t care what you say, they should have won hands down. Once again the Vice-Principal announced to everyone only the first place winner of the event. That’s the chicken way out if you ask me. When I was attending the school, they announced the winners starting with last place along with their score and ended with the first place winners. That way you knew by how much each class won by. Last year, Chris was a Freshman and we found out later that they lost to the Junior’s by ONE POINT! It was easy to see the competition was between the Seniors and the Sophomores. I think what sealed the Sophomore’s fate was the point they pulled first to perform. Oh well … I’m looking forward to next year’s show.

Something is in the air ... more on that at a later time ... hehe ...

My meds are kicking in so I’m off to bed … hope all of you are enjoying the weekend thus far …

Ugh … I forgot to give props to some people I met during the run … here goes …

Big smooches to Dave, Ron, Emma, Peej, Hammah (there’s a story behind that name … LMAO!), Matt, Ben, Alika, Curtis, AJ, Doofus, Gerald, Cray, Dev, and Kalani. Man, I hope I got everyone, and welcome to my blog!

Next venture is the Straub Women’s 10K run. I think it’s on the 3rd of March; Girl’s Day … I gotta double check on that.

I’m going back to bed … everybody is sick … again … have a great weekend if I don’t blog ya tomorrow.

Still recuperating from Monday. The Great Aloha Run came and went and I’m kinda bummed from my finish. My chip time was 2:16:27.6 and I ranked 8112 out of about almost 15000 that registered. Now, without making excuses (hehe), it would have been a better finish if two things hadn’t happened. First, into the first mile, I had the strong urge to pee. Yes, I did go before the race started … like and hour before … but up until the first mile I didn’t have the urge. The freaking line to the bathroom was 8 minutes before it was my turn. Everything went pretty smooth … I was doing good time until I started the fifth mile. It was like my toes were on fire. The shoes I was wearing were only a month and a half into breaking in and I knew I was in trouble. I stepped aside to have someone look at my feet. Sure enough, I had blisters. One of them was so bad it was starting to bleed. I had four of my toes wrapped and I went back into the race. Total time for that delay was another 15 minutes. So, I’m figuring if I found my old running shoes and ran with those, and made myself pee just before the race started, I probably would have finished around the time Chris did. His chip time was 1:34:48.2. Hey, the best part is that it was bonding time with Chris and his friends and I got my shirt! Here’s the link for anyone who wants to see the finishing times or look for people you know.

Well, it seems that Chris … who is a Sophomore … got invited to the Senior Prom the other day. He’s going and I don’t even need to rent a tuxedo for him. He already owns a really nice black one I had to buy him for concert band. All I need to rent for him are the shiny black shoes, cummerbund (he lost his), and the vest.

Last week the band booster had their meeting for everyone who is going on the Vancouver trip next month. I was kind of disappointed at the leadership of the band booster. The biggest question of the night was what would happen if we went to war while they were in Canada. All they could say was “we’ll get back to you on that”. We’ve known for how long about what was going on and what could possibly happen? I can’t believe that they don’t have some kind of plan in case something happens.

Well, this chicky is heading off to bed to continue her recuperation.

Until later …

Welcome back Angel!

Looking back, it's hard to believe that we have lived as long as we
have......

My Mom used to cut chicken, chop eggs and spread mayo on the same
cutting board with the same knife and no bleach, but we didn't seem to
get food poisoning.

My Mom used to defrost hamburger on the counter AND I used to eat it
raw sometimes too, but I can't remember getting E-coli.

As children we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special
treat.

Our baby cribs, toys and rooms were painted with bright colored lead
based paint. We, often chewed on the crib, ingesting the paint.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors, or cabinets, and
when we rode our bikes we had no helmets.

We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle.

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were
back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day.

We played dodgeball and sometimes the ball would really hurt.

We played with toy guns, cowboys and Indians, army, cops and robbers,
and used our fingers to simulate guns when the toy ones or my BB gun
was not available.

We ate cupcakes, bread and butter, and drank sugar soda, but we were
never overweight; we were always outside playing.

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who
didn't, had to learn to deal with disappointment.

Some students weren't as smart as others or didn't work hard so they
failed a grade and were held back to repeat the same grade. That
generation produced some of the greatest risk-takers and problem
solvers. We had the freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and
we learned how to deal with it all.

Almost all of us would have rather gone swimming in the lake instead of a
pristine pool (talk about boring), the term cell phone would have
conjured up a phone in a jail cell, and a pager was the school PA system.

We all took gym, not PE... and risked permanent injury with a pair of high
top Ked's (only worn in gym) instead of having cross-training athletic shoes
with air cushion soles and built in light reflectors. I can't recall any
injuries but they must have happened because they tell us how much safer
weare now. Flunking gym was not an option... even for stupid kids! I guess PE
must be much harder than gym.

Every year, someone taught the whole school a lesson by running in the
halls with leather soles on linoleum tile and hitting the wet spot. How
much better off would we be today if we only knew we could have sued
the school system.

Speaking of school, we all said prayers and the pledge and stayed in
detention after school and caught all sorts of negative attention for the
next two weeks. We must have had horribly damaged psyches.

I can't understand it. Schools didn't offer 14 year olds an abortion or
condoms (we wouldn't have known what either was anyway) but they did
give us a couple of baby aspirin and cough syrup if we started getting
the sniffles.

What an archaic health system we had then. Remember school nurses? Ours
wore a hat and everything.

I thought that I was supposed to accomplish something before I was
allowed to be proud of myself.

I just can't recall how bored we were without computers, PlayStation,
Nintendo, X-box or 270 digital cable stations.I must be repressing that
memory as I try to rationalize through the denial of the dangers could have
befallen us as we trekked off each day about a mile down the road to some
guy's vacant 20, built forts out of branches and pieces of plywood, made
trails, and fought over who got to be the Lone Ranger. What was that
property owner thinking, letting us play on that lot. He should have
been locked up for not putting up a fence around the property, complete
with a self-closing gate and an infrared intruder alarm.

Oh yeah... and where was the Benadryl and sterilization kit when I got
that bee sting? I could have been killed!

We played king of the hill on piles of gravel left on vacant construction
sites and when we got hurt, Mom pulled out the 48 cent bottle of
mercurochrome and then we got our butt spanked. Now it's a trip to the
emergency room, followed by a 10-day dose of a $49 bottle of
antibiotics and then Mom calls the attorney to sue the contractor for
leaving a horribly vicious pile of gravel where it was such a threat.

We didn't act up at the neighbor's house either because if we did, we
got our butt spanked (physical abuse) ... and then we got our butt
spanked again when we got home.

Mom invited the door to door salesman inside for coffee, kids choked
down the dust from the gravel driveway while playing with Tonka trucks
(remember why Tonka trucks were made tough... it wasn't so that they
could take the rough berber in the family room), and Dad drove a car with leaded gas.

Our music had to be left inside when we went out to play and I am sure
that I nearly exhausted my imagination a couple of times when we went
on two week vacations. I should probably sue the folks now for the
danger they put us in when we all slept in campgrounds in the family tent.

Summers were spent behind the push lawnmower and I didn't even know
that mowers came with motors until I was 13 and we got one without an
automatic blade-stop or an auto-drive. How sick were my parents?

Of course my parents weren't the only psychos. I recall Donny Reynolds
from next door coming over and doing his tricks on the front stoop just
before he fell off. Little did his Mom know that she could have owned
our house.Instead she picked him up and swatted him for being such a
goof. It was a neighborhood run amuck.

To top it off, not a single person I knew had ever been told that they were
from a dysfunctional family. How could we possibly have known that we
needed to get into group therapy and anger management classes? We were
obviously so duped by so many societal ills, that we didn't even notice
that the entire country wasn't taking Prozac!

How did we survive?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRIS!

YOU BEAT OLD LADIES FOR PILLS!!!


what's YOUR deepest secret?
brought to you by Quizilla

LMAO! those cartoons crack me up!

Happy Chinese New Year!

The Year of the Ram:

Sianna falls under the year of the Ram ... according to this she should be getting along with her brothers ... Chris is the Rabbit, and Jonathan is the Horse (hmmm ... ).

Years:

1919, 1931, 1943, 1955, 1967, 1979, 1991, 2003

Character:

Gentle and docile, the Ram is sincere & kind-hearted. A pacifist, they never question authority. Fueled by compassion, they admire all of nature’s beauty. Rams strive to create a secure & tranquil environment.

Compatible with:

Rabbit, Horse and Boar

Non-Compatible with:

Ox

Western Counterpart:

Cancer

Famous Rams:

Mel Gibson, Bill Gates, Charles Dickens, Pamela Anderson, Robert De Niro, Mick Jagger, George Wallace, Mark Twain, Barbara Walters, Julia Roberts, Boris Yeltsin, Bruce Willis, Michelangelo, Malcolm Forbes, Julio Iglesias, John Wayne, Joni Mitchell, William Shatner, George Burns, John Denver, Mikhail Gorbachev, Benito Mussolini, Billy Idol and Joe Pesci.


The Year in store for the Ram:

This will feel like a year of abundance for you and your natural generosity will come to the fore. Make sure you always weigh your words well however, as your exuberance could lead to misunderstandings.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SIANNA!

I took Jonathan for his first baby portrait today. He’s such a flirt … wonder who he gets it from.
Anyway, some of you may remember about the bar fight I wrote about over a year ago. Guess who was at the studio … you guessed it … the chick who bit me. She kept looking at me like she was trying to figure out where she saw me before. I walked past her and said the name of the bar and she turned a deep shade of red. I chuckled and took baby in for his turn. When we came back out, she looked at me and smiled. Ah, memories. If I remember correctly, I think she got like 6 months probation. Thank goodness for surveillance cameras.

Well, I’m done for now … gotta get ready to take Chris to his College Workshop later tonight and I got some Band Booster stuff to take care of. Have a great night and big ole smile for my friend.

I have to remember that when I start a new workout plan, I shouldn’t overdue it. The main reason being I tend to get sick when I do. Well, I started a new routine this past Sunday and I am dying. I’ve added Pilates along with my weights and I want to start doing my step aerobics again. The running I’ve put aside for now because of my ankles. I’ve been doing crunches for the past two months and now that I’ve added the Pilates I just hurt all over in the mid section and my inner thighs.

Lately I have been in such a mood. I don’t know if it’s the hormones or the weather. I already have a short fuse and it seems that like the past week it’s a whole lot shorter. It could be PMS, who knows. I have an appointment with my OB next week to do a blood work up along with an ultrasound of my uterus. Something just doesn’t feel right. Wish me luck.

Has anyone ever tasted a chocolate dipped cheesecake from Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory? Those things are so awesome and rich I can only eat a bite or two … too darn rich for me. And now that Chris had to mention it earlier, I have to go out tomorrow and buy a piece to share.

Hope everyone is having a great week thus far. I may be going on a short trip within the next few weeks, I’ll keep you posted.

Until later …

Marketing Communications

Over the years, people have often asked me to explain the
various concepts of Marketing Communications. The following
analogies might help clarify the "tools of the trade."

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say,
"I'm fantastic in bed." -- That's Direct Marketing.

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome
guy. One of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you
says, "She's fantastic in bed." -- That's Advertising.

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his
telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm
fantastic in bed." -- That's Telemarketing.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. You get up and
straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink.
You say, "May I," and reach up to straighten his tie brushing
your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, "By the way,
I'm fantastic in bed." -- That's Public Relations.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and
says, "I hear you're fantastic in bed." -- That's Brand
Recognition.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. You talk him into
going home with your friend. -- That's a Sales Rep.

Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you. -- That's Tech
Support.

You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could
be handsome men in all these houses you're passing. So you
climb onto the roof of one situated toward the center and shout
at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!" -- That's Spam

25 Witty Things to Say to Your Doctor During a Pelvic or Prostate Exam

01. "Take it easy, Doc -- you're boldly going where no man has gone before."

02. "Hey, my chi is unblocking!"

03. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

04. "Can you hear me NOW? ...GOOD!"

05. "Oh, boy! That was sphincteriffic!"

06. "Could you write me a note for my wife, saying that my head is not, in fact, up there?"

07. "You know, in some states, we're now legally married."

08. "Smith, Corporal, U.S. ARMY, 0291563!"

09. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"

10. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out. You do the Hokey Pokey..."

11. "Ever seen 'The Crying Game'?"

12. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"

13. "Doc, wanna see my Ned Beatty impression?"

14. "I love the smell of latex and K-Y in the morning. It smells like... victory!"

15. "Ever gut a squid?"

16. "If the hand doesn't fit, you must acquit!"

17. "Hey, Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

18. "Does this gown make my cervix look fat?"

19. "Go slow, Doc -- I wanna learn how to do this for my friends."

20. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"

21. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

22. "Say, Doc, how's about this time, I get on top?"

23. "Sometimes, when you touch, the honesty's too much, and I have to close my eyes and pee."

24. "Deflector shields: Down!"

25. "Get a camera! We can tell Ripley's Believe It or Not that we're the most unusual Siamese twins EVER!"

Short post tonight …

I don’t know what I’m gonna do with myself … baby is gone until Monday and the other two will be gone most of the weekend.

The weather has been crappy all week so I’ve put off most of my running. To make up for it I did do some aerobics and I’m still doing the weights. With the baby gone, I’ll probably head out to the gym and workout on the treadmill and stair climber.

Great job on finishing the marathon Ghost!

Jonathan is with his daddy this weekend. We took him to his 4-month physical this morning and he got another 4 shots. Dad went with baby this time to get the shots … you could hear him scream from the reception area … poor thing. It’s now 10pm and no phone call yet … I guess baby is doing well … I’ll call them in a bit … I miss my munky.

I’m done … bad headache … have a great weekend!

Men ... YOU CAN'T KILL EM!

Just put the finishing touches on my application for The Great Aloha Run. It will be on February 17. The race starts at 6:59am and the course is about 8 miles long starting from the Aloha Tower and ending at the Aloha Stadium. You’re supposed to put an estimated ending time on the form so they know what color you’ll be assigned to … and to be placed at the starting line. I’m guessing about 2 ½ hours for my time. Chris will be coming with me and I invited some of his friends to come along. The entrance fee is $22 and all of the proceeds will go to various charities around the state. I’ll also get a cool finisher’s shirt.

Happy Birthday JT!

I pampered myself the other day … I got me a total body massage from my friend Patty. She likes to do deep tissue and killing me in the process. I went to see her on Tuesday and I still have little bruises all over my back especially towards my neck. I guess it’s my fault … just a little … because I don’t say anything to her. I just need to see her more often like I used to before I got pregnant. Sometimes we swap massage stories and I crack up because some of my customers, especially the big burly-type men, try to make all macho but you can see them squirming so I tend to put a little more pressure than normal … hehe. Then you have the ones that are ticklish. I had this guy almost fall off the table once … scared the shit out of me because he made a whole production out of it.

I was going to comment on the President’s decision where North Korea is concerned … but I’ll save that for another time.

We’re about to go through another cold front and it’s been hella cold here … ok, shaddup all of you from the mainland. Right now it’s 64 degrees and I’m near freezing my ass off. I’m used to 85-degree weather most of the year and anything below 70 is freezing for me. We’re also getting ready for another swell on the north shore of all of the islands … they’re talking 20-30 foot waves.
I have a lifeguard friend out towards Waimea and he says it’s crazy out there. Especially with the tourist who don’t know about our undertow. That’s why I don’t go swimming there anymore. Even when the waves are just 1-2 feet it can get hard.

Hope everyone has a nice weekend …

So it seems that they have moved up the class reunion. It’s now July 24-28 with the banquet on the 26th. This just blows my previous plans to heck. The reunion will be in Vegas and now I have to decide what I want to do after. The original plan was to fly to New York to visit a bunch of people, but I don’t know now. I’ve also noticed that airfare is higher in July than it is in August. Another factor is that I was going to take up to two weeks off if it was in August. Now that it is in July, I may not be able to take that much time off. We’ll see what happens.

Another milestone happened today … Jonathan rolled over for the first time! I was thrilled. According to Sianna he would have done it yesterday if she weren’t in his way. She’s gonna be upset she missed it.

I better end for now and get some sleep while the baby is down. Been up late the past several nights and it’s catching up with me. Not that I’m complaining or anything … it was time spent worthwhile. I feel bad for last night though because I fell asleep way early. Anyway, have a great week, what’s left of it, and an even better weekend!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WRYGUY!

I’ve learned many years ago to just go with the flow. I no longer make resolutions I know eventually will be broken. I know that sounds negative, but come on … I have yet to meet the person who can actually say they made a resolution and kept it all year. All I can do now is look back at the old year and learn from mistakes that was made, smile at the good memories, and think about how I can become a better person in the new year and set goals for myself. So, with that in mind, I have set a big goal. There is actually a difference. Anyway, my goal this year is to run the Honolulu Marathon in December. Yes, I know a big goal. I’m determined, and knocking on wood nothing happens to me this year that would deter it from happening. There is a pending surgery, but if worse comes to worse that will take about 3 weeks away from training tops. The first step in my training is coming up next month called The Great Aloha Run. It’s an 8-mile course that starts at Aloha Tower Market Place and ends at the Aloha Stadium. I’ve done this one before and it’s a fun run to do. You see a lot of people with strollers and groups of people singing and laughing. You don’t have to run the complete course and all the monies go to charity.

This year will be a busy year not only for myself, but for Chris as well. Chris has two major trips he’ll be taking for band. His concert band (about 80 students) will be heading out to Vancouver for about 8 days. Then in October the whole marching band (300 plus students) will be going to Japan. When I found out about these trips last year I was most definitely going as a chaperone. Now with the baby the Vancouver trip is ifish at this time and I’ll be going to Japan for sure.

This year also marks my 20th high school reunion. It’s going to be in mid August … around the 16th. We have a website to vote the location and from what I hear Vegas is winning as the destination so far. I’m really looking forward to this. I’m already planning to take about two weeks off and take a long needed vacation. The reunion is probably going to be 4 days and I also plan on heading East to visit friends. My 10th reunion was a blast. It lasted the whole weekend. On the last night we must have closed down every club we went to. I remember getting home by about 7:30 in the morning. It’s been almost 14 years since I last went to Vegas and I am very much looking forward to partying there.

I’m finally getting around to reading everyone’s blogs again and I’ve noticed a second round of pregnancies. Congratulations to all that are expecting, I wish you nothing but joy with your new bundle.

I gotta run, but I will be back. Have a great weekend!